Saturday, August 28, 2010

Liam 35 Weeks

Liam 35+5

My appointments this week were good.

My labs were good on Monday and I don't see my Hematologist anymore until after Liam comes. I just continue taking the Lovenox shots and she said that if an emergency situation comes up, the first thing I tell them is when my last shot was, and hopefully they can hold off delivering until 24 hours after the shot.

On Tuesday my NST was great. The nurse told me I was "rocking this pregnancy"...nice to hear, even though I totally don't think I am. Rocking a pregnancy to me would mean having no complications and working up until the day your water breaks or you start having contractions, close to your due date. But, I suppose as far as pre-eclampsia and HELLP syndrome is concerned, I guess I'm rocking it, I've already made it almost 5 weeks past when Lily was delivered.

My Friday appointment (the all-day event) was also good, Liam looked great and scored a 10/10 on the NST and the ultrasound, they saw him practicing breathing, lots of movement, the amniotic fluid level is good and so was the cord blood flow. He seems like an overachiever. He is still head down with his spine on my left side. They haven't measured him in 2 weeks, which kind of makes me nervous, because of Lily having IUGR, but I am sure they will be measuring him again soon. Two weeks ago he was in the 43rd percentile, just about average for weight, height and his head.

Everyone is in agreement that if Liam comes early now, he will be okay and would probably not see any NICU time....music to our ears!

The big news: I have been down-graded from a bomb to dynamite...that's right people, it looks like I will no longer take out a small village, just maybe blow up a house or something. If I make it until next Friday, Dr. J said I might get downgraded to a firework! And hopefully if I can make it to 39 weeks, he said we can all light sparklers.

Even though I am still having some really high pressures at home (160's/110's), at the office it was 108/60 - geez! I think I am so relaxed there, because I feel well taken care of. I also only had 1+ in my urine, so they did not order a 24-hour urine on me.

From Tuesday-Friday, I managed to gain 5 pounds and my hands and face are really swollen. I was worried, and talked to Dr. J about this (sign of pre-e), he said whenever I think something is going on I need to come in. I know my body best. I hate this statement. I feel like it's all on me and it's a lot of pressure. Of course I would go in if I was continuously getting high pressures, or felt like something was really wrong, but it is hard to know with me when that is, because my pressures don't go up until the very.last.second!

More big news: Dr. J reviewed everything from my last delivery and it is his opinion that the safest option for me and Liam is a repeat c-section (hopefully not under general, so Chris can be in the room). I wanted to try a V-bac, but just want a safe delivery, so whatever they think, I will do. He feels like that will be the most "controlled" environment, no one wants my pressure to go up or a bomb/dynamite/firework to go off, during an induction or labor. He also really wants to be the one that does it. And since you can't schedule an elective c-section any earlier than 39 weeks (unless some emergency situation comes up), we are looking at the week of September 19th (my nephew Mason's birthday), but haven't scheduled our date yet. I can guarantee it won't be the 19th (it's a Sunday and Mason's birthday) or the 20th (Dr. J is out of town). Dr. J is pushing for the 21st because it gives my body less time for my pressure to go up, which would put us in an emergency situation. Me and Chris have to talk and then will be scheduling it next Friday. Of course, this is just a "scheduled date to have", if all goes well and I don't show any signs of pre-e or HELLP. It also makes me feel more pressure though too, because I really want it to be controlled and for Dr. J to do it (just because he's done so much for us), which means I really need to make it....hope I can.

Thank you to everyone for all the cards, emails, phone calls and prayers...bedrest is starting to take it's toll, emotionally...it's really hard with Lily, so it's always nice to get a "pick me up"!

Pregnancy: 35+6 (sneak this in just in time)

Weight Gain: 20 pounds, yes, I put on 5 pounds in 3 days - not good!

Sleep: Better when Chris is home, I just worry every night that I might wake up with chest pains (what happened last time), and having enough time to call Chris and get to the hospital

Gender: BOY

Name: Liam

Feeling: Still trying to live through the headaches

Cravings: Nothing really

Health: Still...hmmmm

Movement: He's slowed down a bit the last couple of weeks

Belly: Still big

Current Medications: Still on 30 mg Lovenox shots once/day for Factor II, slow iron for anemia, taking prenatal and extra Folic Acid for MTHFR and I am taking Tylenol for headaches

Next Appointments:
Tuesday - NST
Friday - Ultrasound, NST & see OB Best Blogger Tips

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Liam 34 Weeks

34+5


Chris 34+5 - I think he's carrying a dumpling

This last week was pretty uneventful, on Monday I met with my Hematologist and she sent me right away for a CT scan on my brain, just to rule out any bleeding that may be causing the headaches, my brain is good!

Tuesday I had my NST and Liam wasn't very active and my blood pressure was good. But I dipped 2+ protein on my urine, so they started me on my 10th (yes, I said 10th) 24-hour urine. No one is going to let pre-e sneak up on us this time!

Friday I met with Dr. M. she recommended I stop taking Tylenol for my headaches because she doesn't want my liver enzymes to go up in my labs and for them to think I am having HELLP syndrome, when I may not be. So she prescribed Vicodin. She also told me, in case I wasn't clear about this, that I do not have pre-eclampsia...yet. I haven't had consistently high pressures, protein over 300 in any of my 24-hour urines or swelling. I may have been starting to trend towards these things, but that is why I was put on bedrest, to try and buy time, and by all accounts - it is working. However, she said that most women who do get pre-e get it in their 34-35 week and since I was such an a-typical case last time, getting it so early and so fast, she is glad they are seeing me twice a week, because it could go south soon. Also, the labile pressures I have been having (they are going up and down by 30-50 points, during the day), usually indicate that at some point they will just stay up, but the bedrest could buy us time on that too.

I took a Vicodin Satruday morning...ummm...not doing that again, I started throwing up and then kept throwing up...it sucks. So my new method for my headaches is to just try and ride it out.

This is a kind of funny story...if you can imagine it and have my weird sense of humor...I guess...the other morning I was really sick, throwing up for a while (not from the Vicodin), and Chris wasn't home from work yet. Please keep in mind, I look a mess, okay. I really only shower for my Doctor's appointments and just wear the same pj's, until I smell too bad and then I switch. So anyways, I was really sick and throwing up and Chris always calls on the way home from work to see if he should pick anything up and I heard the phone ring, but was throwing up and inbetween that just lying on the bathroom floor (the cold tile felt good).

Lily is playing in the living room, so I ask her to bring me the phone and my blood pressure cuff. I have to call Chris because I was sure he thought something was going on and was getting scared and I needed to take a pressure, because I knew it would be high (it was). So, Lily brings me those items and then some bunny ears that she wants me to put on....now, I absolutely must put the bunny ears on, my daughter who is clearly being neglected in this bedrest/high-risk pregnancy situation is requesting it. So, I put them on and continue to throw-up. When Chris gets home and comes in the bathroom all he sees is a mess of a pregnant wife lying on the bathroom floor in what's left of my pj's, smelling of vomit, wearing the cutest bunny ears that Lily wanted me to wear. He should have taken a picture....but I'm glad he didn't.

I finally got Lily's Big Sister gift together...I had all the items, just needed to glue the letters on the bag (something I can handle). We got her a camera to take pics of Liam (idea from Martha Compton), a drawing set, stickers, jewelry, lip gloss (she loves lip gloss) and markers...hope she likes it!

Pregnancy: 34+5

Weight Gain: 15 pounds, I am continuing to lose the swelling weight I put on, by being on bedrest

Sleep: Not really happening

Gender: BOY

Name: Liam

Feeling: Still trying to live through the headaches

Cravings: Edy's French Silk icecream (1 bowl a day, keeps the Doctor away!)

Health: Hmmmm

Movement: He's slowed down a bit the last couple of days

Belly: Still big

Current Medications: Still on 30 mg Lovenox shots once/day for Factor II, slow iron for anemia, taking prenatal and extra Folic Acid for MTHFR and they have given me Vicodin for my headaches, but I'm not doing that anymore!

Next Appointments:
Monday - Hematologist
Tuesday - NST
Friday - Ultrasound, NST & see OB Best Blogger Tips

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The Big Sis

With the coming of a little brother, there has been a lot of big changes for The Big Sis

We moved her from her nursery to her Big Girl Room on June 18th and then moved her from her crib to her Big Girl bed on July 20th.


Last night in her nursery :(


First night in her Big Girl Bed
(We'll talk more about her hoarding of all things stuffed, later)

As usual I was emotionally unstable about the move
(she is on a different floor now), but she had no problem.
The transition to Big Girl bed was a little more difficult,
there was crying for about 2 hours and then she fell asleep.

Once we put the drapes up in Lily's new room, I will post pics

On July 10th I painted over Lily's pink nursery walls to get it ready for Liam,
I was pretty proud of myself, 7 months pregnant and knocked it out while
Lily and Chris were napping...it was bittersweet






And once Liam's room is officially "finished", I will post pics

I wasn't sure what Lily was going to think of it,
but she calls it "Weeum's Room"
And since we brought out all the baby stuff again,
Lily thinks she is a baby

Here she is "napping" in Liam's crib

and she also wanted to try out Liam's carseat

she's sure grown a lot in 2 years...
how cute is this little bunny!!! awww!!!

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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Better Late Than Never

Here are some pics from when Aunt Lisa or Wesa, as Lily calls her (Chris' sister), she lives in Arizona, but came to visit us in July for about 2 weeks, I just realized I didn't take nearly enough pics of them together...during her stay I had to work a lot but Chris, Lily and Lisa went to the Museum and Lisa had a big birthday party at PF Chang's which included a vegan birthday cake that was delicious








Here are some pics from my cousin Corrie's baby shower July 24th


These Oreo balls were the bombdiggity
(and were made by Kristi, here is a link to her blog)
I think my husband ate 10

Mason & Lily ate about 10 as well



GGRBow and Lily


Me and Billie


The girl cousins
Tiff (was due August 12th - delivered Aubrey August 11th),
Me (due September 26th),
Billie
Corrie (due August 30th)
Sasha is missing, she lives in Florida

and here are some pics from Renaissance Faire July 31st
(my last weekend out and about)





 Getting ready for their first Elephant ride

 Nana was really scared, Lily can tell you all about it

 Mason and Lily on a ride

 Are these not the cutest pirates you have ever seen?



 This pirate even has a flower :)
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Saturday, August 14, 2010

Liam 33 Weeks

I know it's been a while since I posted an update...I am really sorry, I am trying to take it so easy and with the headaches I have been having, I can't really even think about typing.

Since my last post I am still on bedrest and it seems to be buying us time. My pressures came down right away the first day and the 4 pounds that I packed on (swelling) dropped right off with the rest (same thing happened last time). The only thing that I can't seem to shake are the headaches.

At my NST last Tuesday my blood pressure was great (of course) and the nurse asked if anything else had been going on, I told her I still have this horrible headache and am throwing up. She said she would prescribe something stronger for me to take. I looked back in my little black book and the headaches started on July 15th - I have been dealing with this for a month now. Liam was a little less active on the NST and that made me very nervous, so it took longer than it usually does. The nurse decided to run labs on me again to see if anything is cooking.

Chris and I picked up the prescription and I started taking them that night, because at least with these I can take them every 4 hours instead of waiting every 6. At 2:00 p.m. the nurse called me and told me all my labs came back great.

Wednesday was the worst day of this pregnancy to date. I couldn't even think. These strong pills were not working at.all. - they were not touching this headache. I had to go in our dark bedroom with my sleep mask on and a pillow over my head and I could not take care of Lily (the fact that I threw in the towel with taking care of her speaks volumes to how horrible I was feeling - luckily Chris was off).

Tears streamed down my face, partly because of the pain and partly because I am frustrated with all of this. My gut told me to go to L&D, but I knew my pressures were great (110/60), my urine was clean the day before and my labs came back normal. Unfortunately for me, it seems like nothing is reflected in my labs, urine or pressures until I am terribly sick (or at least that's what I can expect if history repeats itself). So, it seemed pointless to get everyone stressed out about another trip to L&D, when I feel they will just send me home. In retrospect, I need to just go next time, I know something is going on.

Yesterday we had an ultrasound of Liam - he is looking good! Running out of room and getting big. They are estimating he is about 5 pounds (bigger than Lily was when she was discharged from the NICU at 4 pounds 9 ounces) and is measuring in the 43rd percentile...and he has grown into his head! My NST was great - he was very active.

And then we met with Dr. J...I told him that I was crying on Wednesday because of the headache and that I couldn't even take care of Lily. He said I should have definitely come in. He said I am a "ticking time bomb" and they are just all waiting for this to explode like last time. The good part is that I am already further along, but that he knows that something is going to explode and when it does - watch out! He doesn't really want me to take the pain killers for my headaches, because he doesn't want it to mask any symptoms of pre-eclampsia, I agree that I want to be able to tell them exactly how I am feeling. So, the plan is to just try and get to my next appointment, and if anything comes up, I go right to L&D.

In an effort to figure out this horrible headache, I am also going to mention it to my Hematologist on Monday. I have been thinking pre-eclampsia this whole time and maybe it has something to do with a blood clot?

Bedrest is going okay. I think that people think bedrest is easy, but it is emotionally exhausting. I thought last time was hard, but it is even harder to take care of Lily and I feel horrible. I try not to think about that, because the other option if I push it, is we could lose Liam or me, so I need to take it easy and listen to my body. Mostly Lily and I read a lot of books, watch a lot of tv (what else can I do?) and hide alot in my blanket and pretend it's a boat, then we throw stuffed animals overboard. I worry that she is learning bad habits, but I am getting to spend a lot of time with her, which is really nice. I ordered this book about mommy being on bedrest for her, because I don't think she gets why I just lay on the couch all day and can't do dance parties with her anymore or get down and play with her toys with her.

To keep busy I nap alot (partly because I can escape my headache), when Lily does and I pan over my medical records from last time, checking labs and comparing them to my labs this time, looking for some clue as to what this is all about. I am on the preeclampsia forums alot trying to find stories similar to mine, where their blood pressure was the last thing to rise. And it is nice to read everyone's updates on facebook and see what people are doing this summer.

Pregnancy: 33+6

Weight Gain: 17 pounds

Sleep: Not really happening

Gender: BOY

Name: Liam

Feeling: The headaches are really what's killing me lately and the vomiting isn't that wonderful either

Cravings: Edy's French Silk icecream (1 bowl a day, keeps the Doctor away!)

Health: Hmmmm

Movement: Still crazy

Belly: Still big

Current Medications: Still on 30 mg Lovenox shots once/day for Factor II, slow iron for anemia, taking prenatal and extra Folic Acid for MTHFR and they have given me a barbituate for my headaches, but it isn't even working

Next Appointments: Monday - Hematologist
                                  Tuesday - NST
                                  Friday - Ultrasound, NST & see OB Best Blogger Tips

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Bedrest Until Liam Arrives

I wanted to post sooner, but have been waiting until I have a "clear-time" in my head...I guess I think it's now...but, not really

Since my last post (which I was obviously struggling to write because I couldn't believe how many typos there was and I spelled Liam's name Laim...clearly in a state of confusion, or migraine), this is what has happened, and the only reason I really remember anything is because of my black book where I have been recording pressures, symptoms and weight gain:

Monday morning I woke up and had gained 2 pounds, not really a big deal, but with how I had been feeling, it made me a little nervous. I knew I just had to make it until Tuesday and then talk to my OB about how crappy I had been feeling. I had a headache upon waking (not really a surprise because it's been constant for about 1-2 weeks now, coming and going in waves even with 1,000 mg of extra strength Tylenol taken around the clock). Once I got to work I had blurred vision for about 2 hours, but then started to somewhat feel better. I had elevated pressures and when I got off of work I had a pressure of 150/100 - not good.

As with almost every night of this pregnancy, I try to spend as much time with Lily and then I go horizontal on the couch as soon as she goes to bed at 7:00 p.m., this night I put my feet up because I thought they were starting to look swollen. At about 8:30 p.m. I went to the bathroom and I thought my face looked really puffy, me, the same person that's been looking at this face everyday. I went on the scale and was up 6 pounds from the morning, I decided that I could have had salt or whatever and I would weigh myself in the morning and hope the swelling would go down.

Tuesday morning I still have the headache, but am only up 2 more pounds (a total of 4 pounds in 2 days, keep in mind in the last 32 weeks I have only gained 16 pounds total). I took my Tylenol and took Lily over to my mom's before work. After I dropped off Lily I started to have "floaters" in my vision, I got nervous about driving, but made it to work, where my vision was still blurry, my blood pressures were high and I still had a headache. My boss and co-worker drove my car home and arranged to have Chris come pick me up before my appointment.

My appointment was at 4:45 p.m., but we didn't get in until 5:25 p.m., I was ready with my black book to tell Dr. J all this new stuff. The nurse took my blood pressure (which is always super low at the Doctor) and it was 142/82. She started the NST. Liam looks great. Dr. J told me I had no protein in my urine, but they are a little concerned about my blood pressure. I try to recall all my symptoms, but am having a really bad headache, so I have Chris get out the book and go over everything.

I can tell Dr. J is a little stunned when I tell him that my boss had to drive my car home, stunned that I am still working full-time. Right away he says that I need to be on bedrest and we will try to get to 34 weeks, then 36 weeks, then 37 and if I am still not feeling well that will be it. I told him I was scared because I am having a lot of the same symptoms and I don't want it to be too late for Liam or me....I feel like a lot more is on the line this time already having Lily.

He gets things rolling for Tuesday and Friday appointments, Tuesday's being a NST and a meeting with a Nurse Practitioner and Fridays being a long day with NST, ultrasound with growth measurement, cord blood flow and fluid and then appointment with an OB, about 3-4 hours depending on how they can get the appointment.

He is also going to talk with my hematologist and an anesthesiologist about what we should do about delivery. He needs to go over the records from last time, there was that crazy seizure that happened, which no one (especially me) wants to happen again. And since I need to be off of Lovenox for 24 hours before I can get an epidural my Hematologist wants to schedule an induction or c-section at least 1 week before my due date. I had wanted to try a v-bac, but it might be too dangerous. So, he is going to do some research and told us that I might be put under general again (totally knocked out)...I was really hoping to see Liam being born, because that was one of the hardest things about last time (being knocked out), but I just want everything to be safe for Liam and me, so I am going to do whatever they suggest.

So, I don't have pre-eclampsia (because to make that diagnosis they need more than 300 protein in my urine, high pressures and swelling)...but the plan is that no one (especially me) wants me to get as sick as I was last time. I know Chris and I joke (now) about my organs failing last time and about me almost dying....but, that's what happened, and it's pretty dang serious, especially now that we already have a little one that's depending on having two parents.

I leave the appointment feeling a range of emotions, sad that this might be the start of me being sick, disappointed in myself for not being able to hold out longer, worried about Chris, Lily and work (especially my boss and co-workers), worried that people will wonder why we decided to have another baby, worried about me and Liam and terrified of being hospitalized or even worse of Liam not coming home with us and going to the NICU.

And after crying for many hours by myself in bed Tuesday night (Chris was working), I realized that this doesn't have to be "the end", this can be the beginning of my full-term pregnancy (I hope). If I can make it 3 weeks in the hospital as sick as I was last time, finding strength to hold on until the last possible hour, there is no doubt that I can make it longer this time, I am not as sick to begin with and I will be in my own home with the best medicine - Lily. And like Dr. J said, if I start getting really sick I can always check-in at the Pavilion (Aurora Women's Pavilion, he likes to make it sound like a hotel. which it kind of is). The goal is "healthy mom, healthy baby, safe delivery" and the goal for me personally is to bring Liam home with us, something I have dreamed of since the beginning of this pregnancy.

So, looking at the pros of this situation in comparison with my 25 day stay at the "Pavilion" last time:
  • I'm already 32 weeks without anything going wrong, last time it was 28 weeks 
  • I'm in my home, sleeping in my own bed
  • I get to see Lily everyday and night and sleep in the same house as her
  • I get last minute time with Lily snuggling before Liam arrives
  • I can hug Chris and sleep in the same bed as him
  • I get bathroom and shower privileges
  • No catheter or iv's - and no mag
  • No one has to help me shower
  • I can eat
  • If I want to feel fresh air, I can peek my head out the door
  • I get to see my cats (I cried everyday about my cats last time, I can only imagine the sobbing I would be doing about missing Lily)
  • We tried to get as much done as possible fearing something like this and tried to do as much with Lily as we could this summer (even though we will miss State Fair and Zoo a la carte)
  • I get to go out 2 days/week to Doctor's appointments, and let's face it a coffee and cookie in the pavilion is pretty comparable to Starbucks and browsing the gift shop is almost as good as Target (go with me on these)
Yesterday I felt the worse that I have felt yet, very sick to my stomach with a headache that won't stop, but my pressures have come down to 100/60, which is great. Today I had the same headache and floaters, but got relief from about 2:00-4:00 p.m., where I thought I was getting better, but my headache is back.

Hopefully this bedrest can keep pre-eclampsia at bay and I have three reasons to hold on and make it through each day....


this little Lily

and this little Liam

and this Crazy Chris
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